|
|
|
|
There's an old custom that says in a leap year, a woman is not expected to wait for a man to "pop the question" but can do the asking herself. Leap day is, of course, the most appropriate day to do it. (Rumor has it that Scotland , in 1288, established Leap Day as the one day when a woman could propose to a man… and required him to pay a fine if he refused her!
The leap year custom originated at a time when men did not wear engagement rings (and when women often did not receive an engagement ring either). At the same time, it has been acceptable since the 1920s for a woman to give her fiancé an engagement ring if she liked, regardless of who proposed.
Within the last few years, engagement rings for men have enjoyed a surge of popularity. So, while tradition doesn't require you to provide a ring, modern custom certainly allows it. He can buy you an engagement ring later, too, if he likes. In fact, it might be simplest for the two of you to go shopping together after he accepts your proposal.
Many couples who have a more conventional proposal go ring-shopping together simply because that's the sure way to end up with a ring that the wearer will love.
If your heart is set on surprising him with a ring, bear in mind that there's no tradition that men's rings should be a diamond or any other stone. Semi-precious stones are perhaps a bit more traditional for men's engagement rings, but his birthstone or any stone he likes would be appropriate. Another popular option is for both of you to wear matching claddagh rings during the engagement. Do think in advance about how he might want to wear his rings after the wedding, as it's unlikely that he'll be able to fit two rings on his ring finger unless both rings are fairly plain and narrow. If he plans to switch the engagement ring to his right hand, it will probably need to be resized, which can be hard on fragile antiques and may spoil a long engraved message.
As far as proposing to Mr. Right, the trick is to delight him with the role reversal without making him feel that you want to be the boy. Doing a literal-minded recreation of a "traditional" proposal (man gets down on bended knee, whips out box with diamond ring) is probably not the best strategy, but the almost-as-traditional approach of taking the beloved out for a romantic evening that culminates in "will you marry me?" is perfectly appropriate.
You can also find inspiration at The RoMANtic's collection of stories about ways that couples make their relationship more romantic. There is a section specifically on proposals, but you may also want to check out the stories about romance at home, at work, or at play.
Whatever you do, remember to keep it simple enough that you're both relaxed and in the mood to have fun together! Even if you're sure of the answer, proposing will make you nervous enough without the interference of botched travel reservations or an ill-timed rainstorm. Make it a memorable occasion, but stop short of stressing yourself out… and remember, even some very unromantic proposals have led to long and happy marriages!
Original article by Wende Vyborney.
© WedNet LLC. All rights reserved.
|
|
|